I've been thinking about my thirties. About how they started, and how they're about to end. Ten years ago at my thirtieth birthday party, I was bloated from massive doses of steroids I had earlier in the year thanks to a serious respiratory virus. I was puffy faced and swollen, or if I was being truly honest, … Continue reading The birth of my fourth decade
One year on, and three years drug free. Just quietly, I’m feeling quite proud. And strong – SO strong.
Always expect the unexpected. Be prepared like a girl scout without the rules (but with teh cookies). That’s always been one of my life’s mottos. After taking my last ever dose of opiate antagonist therapy last Friday, I was relieved when I only had some minor restless limbs when I turned in for bed that evening. I had been on the lowest dose possible, so I couldn’t have predicted what was going to happen next. On Saturday night, I drove up the coast for a prawn fest and I lay awake all night. I only had a couple of ‘punches’, in that my arms went a little haywire and my legs were sore, but it was nothing I couldn’t handle.
I’ve always adhered to the adage that our hell is here on earth, and on Sunday night, that was very much the case. My legs were kicking uncontrollably, my…
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Someone I've known for just shy of twenty years said something to me back in September, and I've been ruminating over it as I approach my fortieth birthday. We were talking about our inner voice. You know, about what we say to our selves in the quiet of our hearts; the things we think, but keep … Continue reading Ch-Ch-Ch-Chaaaaaanges
Tonight as the waning moon floats between shelves of cloud - the stars liquid and alive - I will whisper, 'I am still here.' A bittersweet offering, but one I cast into the world as a call to arms. With each passing year, I harvest guilt, siphoning off grief as I pick the fruit and plant more seeds for … Continue reading A love letter to my lungs on this, your eighteenth birthday
Wooloweyah 28.6.16 It is akin to a dream, this dense clump of trees unfolding before me, reaching so sharply into the sky. As I walk through the forest under canopies of palms and eucalypts and a discord of screaming birds, my feet arrive at a bog. I'm at the lip of a lake I cannot reach for … Continue reading The places I go …
In May, I was invited to speak at the P.A's clinical ethics forum for National Palliative Care week. This year's theme was 'Living Well with Chronic Illness', and before the forum, I met with three lovely ladies to mull over what I might like to discuss in my talk (sex? It was a unanimous YES). … Continue reading Speaking my truth (and a whole lot of fact)
A story from my childhood has recently been featured on photographer and multidisciplinary artist Mindy Stricke's website for her 'Grief Landscapes' project. You can find it here. A little about 'Grief Landscapes' ... 'for the initial phase of Grief Landscapes, I’m documenting the unique terrain of people’s grief through photography and a collaborative process with the … Continue reading Purple cardigan
Shot a gun ✔ I did my firearms safety training in January. Be afraid. Very afraid. Gone on a blind date ✔ Oh, the horror. Skipped school ✔ Watched someone give birth ✔✔ My eldest and youngest nephews, now 14 and 9 respectively. It was an absolute honour. Watched someone die ✔✔✔✔ I think I've … Continue reading Riding on elephants and other shit I haven’t done
Life. It gets in the way. That's why I haven't blogged for three months because there's been a lot going on. For the last month or so, I've been down with the lurgy (the flu), but after two courses of antibiotics, probiotics, lots of vitamins, good food and rest, I'm on my way to being back … Continue reading Where in the world are you, Carmen Sandiego?
A couple of years after my transplant, I was assaulted. Had the shit beaten out of me. What made it even more shameful, was that I was beaten up by a girl. Of course this rationale has evolved with the gradual unfurling of my life and hard won wisdom, so I know that it doesn't matter who … Continue reading When you get punched in the face